"um...no, we have panuche which is a brown sugar based fudge, but it's not maple"
"in canada they have maple fudge"
"in canada they have socialized healthcare and money that looks like checks, welcome to america"
"so do you have the perma-wedgie?"
"yep! but i hear that after a while you get used to it and don't even notice it"
"my shoulder has problems because i got hit by a car while riding my bike home from work"
"that sucks man, did you get any money out of it?"
"well i replaced my $80 wal-mart bike with a $550 schwin"
"we're about to ban you from ribbon tying, it's not because they're ugly, they're really very nice, but you're just so slow at them"
"it's true, i'm very bad at all things giftwrapping"
"it's just a manual dexterity thing"
"actually i've got quite good manual dexterity"
"oh, then it must be a mental issue"
"oh great, because we all know i need another one of those!"